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| Image credit to Darren Crabb, edited by me. |
Many old sayings like this don't make any sense or hold true that often, but in my experience as a teacher I find it to be highly accurate. Kids who make smart choices at school usually have parents that have done the same. Parents that have made poor choices in their own lives generally have kids who tend to make poor choices.
When I was a kid my parents would usually take a "parents only" trip once a year. I remember that I had a gift to open each day they were gone and that made everything easier for me. My Aunt Danna remembers how I stubbornly refused to go to bed. She has reminded me on several occasions about my stubbornness that I displayed on those days I stayed at her home while my parents travelled.
Aunt Danna was just sharing a funny anecdote, but I found parenting advice.
As we started back to school this week we did everything we knew to do to prepare the girls. We started taking them to the sitter for half days a couple weeks in advance and upped it to full days a few days before our first teaching day. The result- Lilly (the 3-year-old) EXPLODED the night before our first day!
Thursday was the first 'teacher day' and Allison came home exhausted and stressed. She is navigating the beginning of the year without her stalwart teammate who retired, plus a new principal and head secretary. Things have been challenging for her. We had dinner with my parents, got things together for Friday, and put the girls to bed. Allison went back to school to "cross her t's and dot her i's."
Then the storm hit.
See, Lilly has a fear of thunderstorms that baffles us. Allison and I enjoy a good storm and even have a couple of thunderstorm CD's we use to fall asleep to.
Lilly woke up and scurried into my lap. Allison was on the way home. Things were just getting started at the Casa de Smiley circa 10pm. By 11 we had spent some time in the basement waiting out the tornado warning and were putting the girls to bed; Gwen willingly but Lilly not so much.
She was scared. She was hungry. She had to go to the bathroom. She wanted us to pray with her again. She wanted us to stay in her bedroom. She wanted anything but to be alone, and would get out of bed every. time. we. left! At one point I had to ask Allison to take over because I was at wits end. A little after midnight she was asleep and we quickly followed suit.
Just after 4am Lilly came into our room again. By 5 I thought she might be asleep but it was time to get my workout in anyway. Not too long into my workout my crying, sleep-deprived, and frustrated angel of a wife came out and asked that I did something with Lilly because she was at her breaking point. I laid Lilly down next to my workout equipment and finished my exercising.
Fast-forward to Friday night and the same things happened at bed time. Lilly slept the night on the floor of our bedroom. A frustrated post on Facebook by me received several suggestions and one "sounds familiar" comment from the aforementioned Aunt Danna.
I was every bit as stubborn as Lilly. I drove my Aunt Danna batty with my refusal to sleep. I'm sure I did the same to my parents, too.
I remember my parents letting me in their bed a few times as a kid when I was scared. Their patience with me helped me overcome and develop my own coping strategies.
Suddenly, I feel relaxed about this. This behavior by Lilly won't last, it didn't for me. My patience as a parent will dictate how well this turns out, just like it did for my parents and me.
The apple doesn't fall far. And for that, I am thankful and encouraged.
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